Welcome to my world!

Sometimes I feel like that old tree on the ridge. I've experienced and learned so much in my life, and continue to learn and grow in my environment. My sense of what's good and right and valued comes from the wonderful people I've encountered; my faith in God and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and my delightful children & grandchildren who continue to teach and refine my perspective.



And yet, like that old tree, I am standing, sometimes alone, to represent those good and grand values, standards and goals. My roots strongly cling to the rocks and sparse dirt that sustains me. My arms and face reach to the sky acknowledging how small I am compared to the vast universe of creation. I feel the sun on my face and the wind as it passes me by; and I have felt the fury of storms filled with debris, as they assail me with doubts, insecurities, and wounds from the past.



Join me as I journey through life, sifting through the chaff and tares of mortality and striving every day to make something good out of the tools I have been given.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Change


Change
If there is one constant in mortality, it is change.  I’m not sure that I have always welcomed it in my life since I tend to see myself as someone who wants stability, but I have at least recognized that change is an old comrade.    And, as I reflect on my life, there has been change that has blessed me.
One of those changes was the opportunity to be introduced to the gospel of Jesus Christ when I was in high school.  The interesting note about this missionary moment was not that a friend bore their testimony, or that the elders found us while tracting. The gospel came into my life because of an acquaintance of the family.  Her name was Emily and she was the mom of several kids, one of whom was my age; her husband and my mom’s husband were friends.  Emily had invited the whole family to church several times, I attended a youth group once in a while, and then, she took a deep breath, and wrote our name on a referral card.  I imagine that she handed over that referral with some trepidation; my mother was not someone you wanted to meet in a dark alley.  But the Spirit spoke to Emily, and her inspiration became the first step to my baptism.
The stake missionaries called, set up an appointment and made the first visit.  I honestly don’t remember much about the visit, how their message was received, or how far apart the appointments were.  What I do remember was the feeling that this was the message that I had been waiting for my whole life (all 16 years of it.)  I didn’t need to finish the Book of Mormon at that time; I didn’t have burning questions to challenge the missionaries; I just knew it was true.
If you’re not familiar with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, let me share with you what was and is true.  I knew that this young teenager, Joseph Smith, had been visited by angels, ancient prophets of old, and most importantly, by God and his Son, Jesus Christ.  I knew that God, our Heavenly Father, had restored the gospel of Jesus Christ to the earth and that along with that message, He had also restored His ancient priesthood power back to the earth.  Along with that, I learned about how the body of the Church was organized, why reverencing the Sabbath was so important for man; how I could accept the Grace of God and then, daily, live my life exemplifying the gospel principles in which I so fully believed.
There is so much more:  deeper and sweeter than this short description above.  But it was that change in my life that has transformed me into who I am today.   And with that transformation, I have been able to traverse through the minefields of life: change. 
There are several changes that one must make in their life.  In my life, I have changed from single to married, child-less to mother of 5, a full house to empty nesting all the while balancing relationships, responsibilities, and the various roles of women.  One of the blessings of parenting is welcoming grandchildren; one of the bittersweet evolutions of parenting is separation. 
On my horizon is my next change:  moving.  Now I have moved many times and have lived in several states.  I used to boast that I had attended 14 schools from 1st grade to High School graduation; as an adult I have moved almost as much.  But this move, for some reason, unsettles me a bit.  I think it is because with this move, we go from a state of semi-permanence, to a state of uncertainness.  And even though we move back into our permanent home in Colorado, it is with the knowledge that we won’t be there long.  The next job assignment for Dennis is transitional, perhaps a few months on his own on the east coast while I remain in our Rocky Mountains.  But separation doesn’t bother me; we’ve been through that before.  It is the absence of belonging that I fear.
Belonging is one of the basic needs of humans, being a part of a greater whole.  In a lifetime, we are a part of several groups:  families, classes, clubs, teams, etc.  Many of those groups are temporary, or transitional.  A few of those groups are everlasting.  However, I know that there is one place of belonging that is eternal: in the arms and household of a Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.  My knowledge, my faith, and my continual belief in the gospel give me the needed sense of belonging to maintain my spiritual foundation, even when my temporal circumstances seem fluid and ever-changing. 
In the end, it will always be my spiritual side that perseveres.  Whatever the changes of life may be,  I will face them with (or probably without) grace or style, but face them I will.  I know it’s comforting for me to know that I won’t be alone when they come.  For Christ is my King, His angels are around me protecting me from evil, the Holy Ghost whispers in my ear that I can do this.  With my husband by my side, my childrens' arms supporting me with their love, and my Heavenly Father sending me His peace, the future will become the present without even a glance and my past will contain the residue of trials overcome.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

My legacy


I watched highlights from the Oprah show today because I when went to the dentist's office they had it on their waiting room TV.  One of the segments was about a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer when her daughter was 5.  The mom recognized that she would die during her daughter’s childhood and she used the time before her death to record thoughts and counsel for her daughter to view after her death.  It was a very touching episode. 
So, I’ve thought about what kind of a legacy have I left for my children and grandchildren; especially since Laura and Jason won’t speak to me.  Jason locked me out of his life in 2005; I don’t know exactly why.  In September 2010 we asked Laura to leave our home.  She responded with much anger and accusations; I don’t know if she will ever forgive me.  But, even with the knowledge that 2 of my children are at odds with me, I can still hope that I can offer something worthwhile to the rest of my family. 
I’ve learned that the human spirit is both resilient and fragile.  It is resilient and enduring even when abused or neglected.  There is something innate in the human psyche that can continue to survive, and grow in the most austere circumstances.  That spark of human spirit clings to life like the bare roots of a bristlecone pine on the mountain side.  It cannot be extinguished and should not be diminished by any individual.  I think that one of the responsibilities that we as children of God is to not only protect but to nourish that spark in everyone we meet.
The responsibility to nurture especially lies in the role of parents.  I cringe inwardly every time I hear a parent lash out at a child.  I know that parents must discipline their children; and in doing so the tone of their voices may be strong and strident; but I’m referring to times when the interaction of parent and child is more akin to verbal abuse & harassment.  I believe that children, teens, adults, basically everyone should be cherished and valued.  Our job is to teach, and hold accountability with tearing anyone apart.  I believe in discipline, I believe in accountability and responsibility for your actions; but too many people use the platform of “discipline” or “accountability” as a forum to decimate another individual by destroying their spirit.
With these thoughts in mind, I challenge you, my loved ones: choose carefully the words you use with others.  Please temper your thoughts with love.  Discipline with love, express your concerns with others with compassion and nourish others by empowering them. When you hold your child’s fragile spirit, remember that they are blessings from God.  I know that this has always been my goal, but I am sure that there have been times that my words have wounded you. Please forgive me for the times when I failed to treat you with love and respect.  I know that you are better parents than I was and I am proud of you.
So the question will always be:  what kind of a legacy will I be leaving my children?  I hope it’s one of charity & service; it’s one of knowledge and understanding; it’s one of love and acceptance.  When I speak of spiritual things, I have to have the spirit of understanding with humility.  When I speak of practical things, I have to have the attitude of service.  I guess the next step will be setting goals and monitoring myself to see if I have made the necessary adjustments to myself to achieve my dreams.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Christmas Letter 2010


Greetings to all of our friends and family! So much has happened that Christmas of 2010 snuck up on our hectic lives and it was too late to get anything in the mail. So here is the top ten events of the Dennis and Glenna traveling show 2010 and 2011:


      10     We are indeed in Mississippi! Dennis has returned to nuclear power and is assigned to Grand Gulf for an upcoming outage that will take us into 2012. (Feb 2011 - present)
      9       Dennis was assigned to the “Katrina Wall Project” in New Orleans. We lived in a hotel, toured the area’s attractions, made friends and basked in Southern hospitality. (March 2010 – Feb 20 2011)
      8       Since we were far from family, we engaged an impromptu trip to Disneyworld where the Mouse catered the joys and experiences that will be part of our memories together. (Nov 2010)
      7       April 2011 found us cruising to and around Mexico and Belize where we toured four separate Mayan and Aztec ruins, including Chichen Itza.
      6       August 2010 we cruised to Alaska where we embarked on an extended land tour bringing us within the shadows on Mt McKinley and in the neighborhood of many bear, moose and caribou. It was both educational and inspiring and included a visit with Kirsten and Ila.
      5       Thanksgiving is a family event, so we traveled to Massachusetts in 2011 to enjoy the celebration with Dennis’ mother and sister’s family.
      4       In June of 2010 the bi-annual Hangen reunion was held at our house in Colorado. It was a dream come true for Glenna to gather together family that is scattered across the country as they came together to celebrate their unity in the finely woven fabric of history.
      3       Laura was blessed with a companion where the relationship blossomed, matured and culminated in a wedding in June of 2011.
      2       David and Kevin both served in Iraq and were both blessed to come home safely, reuniting with their families, while Jon was reunited with his family after his tour in Afghanistan.
      1       Three new additions to the family were welcomed in: Jeffrey born in April 2010 to David & Collette; Aisley, born in December 2010 to Kirsten & Jon; and Tavin born in July 2011 to Jason & Nicole.

As you can see, life has not been boring for us. We are constantly facing new opportunities, new challenges and new experiences in our united pathway through life. Christmas will find us cruising the Hawaiian Islands and it looks like Georgia will be our next assignment, where we will continue to bask in that old Southern hospitality once more.
God has blessed us abundantly as He has many of you. This is that time of year where we pause to reflect on the greatest of all those blessings – the birth of Jesus Christ, our Savior. Even though many are trying to remove Him from this celebration, we add our voices to the chorus of truth declaring that Jesus is the Christ, He was born to a virgin mother, He did teach the gospel of salvation, and He eventually suffered and died for our sins. May your life be blessed with the greatest blessing of all; to know that little Babe of Bethlehem who taught the truth of the gospel, suffered because of it and eventually died to fulfill all righteousness. We wish you a Merry Christmas and hope that you keep the true spirit of the season in your life. We celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.